Golden Rule

In my last blog, I spoke of our ego-centric world. And that cuts to a core belief I have. When asked what the fundamental nature of humanity is, good or evil? - I answer “Neither.” Humans are fundamentally self-centered.

When a tiny baby cries, it is not because of an evil intent. Babies cry for their very survival. They are helpless.

Conversely, when a tiny baby coos, it is not because the infant is trying to please the parents. Babies are in their own world and everything revolves around them.

The majority of world religions have a version of the Golden Rule i.e. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.* It is an expression of getting outside of oneself, of getting away from the selfishness and the self-centered lives that we lead.

It is not easy. Truly caring about another interferes with our own plans. Yet, getting outside of ourselves is how we grow as a person. Our maturity level increases as we help someone else.

I recognize that I still have much maturing to do. My mom and I once had a discussion in which we realized that your parents raise you so far and then the rest is up to you. I am grateful for the solid foundation I received. Now it is time to try to fly.

*http://www.religioustolerance.org/reciproc.htm
Excerpt from website:
Some "Ethic of Reciprocity" passages from the religious texts of various religions and secular beliefs:

Bahá'í Faith: "Ascribe not to any soul that which thou wouldst not have ascribed to thee, and say not that which thou doest not." "Blessed is he who preferreth his brother before himself." Baha'u'llah

Brahmanism: "This is the sum of Dharma [duty]: Do naught unto others which would cause you pain if done to you". Mahabharata, 5:1517

Buddhism: "Hurt not others in ways that you yourself would find hurtful." Udana-Varga 5:18

Christianity: "And as ye would that men should do to you, do ye also to them likewise." Luke 6:31, King James Version.

Confucianism: "Do not do to others what you do not want them to do to you" Analects 15:23

Ancient Egyptian: "Do for one who may do for you, that you may cause him thus to do." The Tale of the Eloquent Peasant, 109 - 110 Translated by R.B. Parkinson. The original dates to 1970 to 1640 BCE and may be the earliest version ever written.

Hinduism: This is the sum of duty: do not do to others what would cause pain if done to you. Mahabharata 5:1517

Humanism: "Don't do things you wouldn't want to have done to you" British Humanist Society

Islam: "None of you [truly] believes until he wishes for his brother what he wishes for himself." Number 13 of Imam "Al-Nawawi's Forty Hadiths."

Jainism: "A man should wander about treating all creatures as he himself would be treated. " Sutrakritanga 1.11.33

Judaism: "...thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.", Leviticus 19:18

Native American Spirituality: "All things are our relatives; what we do to everything, we do to ourselves. All is really One." Black Elk

Roman Pagan Religion: "The law imprinted on the hearts of all men is to love the members of society as themselves."

Shinto: "The heart of the person before you is a mirror. See there your own form"

Sikhism: "Don't create enmity with anyone as God is within everyone." Guru Arjan Devji 259

Sufism: "The basis of Sufism is consideration of the hearts and feelings of others. If you haven't the will to gladden someone's heart, then at least beware lest you hurt someone's heart, for on our path, no sin exists but this." Dr. Javad Nurbakhsh, Master of the Nimatullahi Sufi Order.

Taoism: "Regard your neighbor's gain as your own gain, and your neighbor's loss as your own loss." T'ai Shang Kan Ying P'ien.

Unitarian: "The inherent worth and dignity of every person;" "Justice, equity and compassion in human relations.... " "The goal of world community with peace, liberty, and justice for all;" "We affirm and promote respect for the interdependent web of all existence of which we are a part." Unitarian principles.

Wicca: "An it harm no one, do what thou wilt" (i.e. do what ever you will, as long as it harms nobody, including yourself). One's will is to be carefully thought out in advance of action. This is called the Wiccan Rede

Yoruba: (Nigeria): "One going to take a pointed stick to pinch a baby bird should first try it on himself to feel how it hurts."

Zoroastrianism: "Whatever is disagreeable to yourself do not do unto others." Shayast-na-Shayast 13:29

Shoes

I have been inspired by my friend Eric to begin my own blog. And whenever
I think of Eric, I think of shoes.

When I was married, I made the smart decision to not only buy a very pretty
pair of pumps, but also a very comfortable pair. I wore them for years
afterwards.


When I went to Levi’s first wedding, I bought a very beautiful pair of
heels. Unfortunately, they were also very uncomfortable. They, like the
marriage, didn’t last long.


Currently, I am wearing the shoes I bought to wear to Allen and Annie’s
wedding. They are very beautiful. Not very practical for walking long
distances, but they are comfortable. When Mark has his shoes off and I
have these ones on, I am just a smidge taller than him.


A co-worker of mine believes everyone notices shoes. I disagree with him.
We are all too worried about what is on our own feet to pay close attention
to what is on someone else’s. We may notice someone else’s shoes in a
passing look, in order that we may judge. “Oh those shoes are cute!”
“Those shoes are hideous, why would anyone wear them?” “That person went
out with shoes looking like THAT?!” But these are passing judgments, it is
more often that the shoes on someone’s feet are ignored.


We (and by we I mean womankind; I cannot speak for men) buy shoes to help
feed our own ego. We think “These shoes make me feel taller/sexier/more
intelligent/beautiful.” We each exist in our own ego-centric world. Very
rarely do we do anything that is solely for others. Shoe buying is no
exception.


The shoes that I am wearing do have the ability to remind me of Waikiki and
two young people very in love. This memory takes me out of my own world
for a moment. I wish Allen and Annie many years of happiness together. I
hope that they, and my shoes, last a long time.

(correction: I made a very smart decision to listen to my sister Paula and get comfortable shoes for my wedding!)